A lot of us need to admit this to ourselves. Honestly, how much longer can you live like this? I can't do it any longer, I need to STOP!
I need to stop thinking about you, it's stupid, and you obviously don't think about me. I need to stop wishing my life away because one day I am going to wish for this time back. I need to stop regretting the decisions I have made. I made them, and there is no going back. I am done feeling like I am not good enough, and that I am not skinny enough. I am just done! I don't want to feel like this anymore. And I need to stop!
I need to stop being scared of what could happen, and focus on what is happening. I need to stop forcing myself to believe in things that I don't believe. I am done pretending. I need to stop focusing on the bad things in my life, and start thinking about the good.
Why do I need to stop?
So I can be happy.
Isn't it all these things I need to stop that are causing me to be unhappy? Ya......... They are. Now, I am not just going to tell you all of the things that I should stop doing. I am really going to stop doing these things. Because I want to be happy. And I would hope that you would also do this, just be yourself, and not worry! Because YOU deserve to be happy! :)
Sunday, February 24, 2013
I'm not Scared. I'm just Afraid
I'm afraid. I'm afraid of death and those creepy white rape vans!
No! I do NOT want your candy!!! Sorry about your cat, go ask that muscular guy over there to help you.
I'm afraid that my aunts great dane is going to eat me. (It's going to happen one day!) I'm afraid that my sister is going to get cancer. I'm afraid that I am going to walk into my grandmas house and find her dead. I'm afraid of my parents getting a divorce, and of my brother getting a divorce (after he gets married) because of a stupid mistake he made. I'm afraid of being alone FOREVER. #foreveralone. And of getting in a car accident.
I'm afraid of being a disappointment to my family and friends. I'm afraid of having my foot hammered into the floor! Eww! Gross. Throw up everywhere!
I'm afraid of getting Alzheimers. My grandma had to go through it and it was a painful experience, not only for her, but her family as well. I'm afraid of Barbies coming alive! I'm afraid of saying too many goodbyes. I am afraid of what I want in life. I'm afraid of what he wants. And secretly, I am afraid of you...
No! I do NOT want your candy!!! Sorry about your cat, go ask that muscular guy over there to help you.
I'm afraid that my aunts great dane is going to eat me. (It's going to happen one day!) I'm afraid that my sister is going to get cancer. I'm afraid that I am going to walk into my grandmas house and find her dead. I'm afraid of my parents getting a divorce, and of my brother getting a divorce (after he gets married) because of a stupid mistake he made. I'm afraid of being alone FOREVER. #foreveralone. And of getting in a car accident.
I'm afraid of being a disappointment to my family and friends. I'm afraid of having my foot hammered into the floor! Eww! Gross. Throw up everywhere!
I'm afraid of getting Alzheimers. My grandma had to go through it and it was a painful experience, not only for her, but her family as well. I'm afraid of Barbies coming alive! I'm afraid of saying too many goodbyes. I am afraid of what I want in life. I'm afraid of what he wants. And secretly, I am afraid of you...
Friday, February 15, 2013
I'm Thinking About You Like....
I'm thinking about you.
I'm thinking about you like the sky thinks about stars.
Like stars think about the moon.
Like the moon thinks about the sun.
And the sun thinks about clouds.
I'm thinking about you like clouds think about rain.
Like rain thinks about falling.
Like falling thinks about catching.
Like catching thinks about my heart.
And my heart thinks about You.
I'm thinking about you like you think about sports.
Like sports think about first place.
Like first place thinks about happiness.
Like happiness thinks about sadness.
Like sadness thinks about death.
And death thinks about life.
I'm thinking about you like life thinks about tomorrow.
Like tomorrow thinks about yesterday.
Like yesterday thinks about mistakes.
Like mistakes think about success.
And success thinks about money.
I'm thinking about you like money thinks about cars.
Like cars think about driving.
And driving thinks about crashing.
I'm thinking about you like crashing thinks about the ground.
Like the ground thinks about shoes.
Like shoes think about socks.
Like socks think about warmth.
Like warmth thinks about hugs.
And hugs think about kisses.
I'm thinking about you like kisses think about Love.
I'm thinking about you like the sky thinks about stars.
Like stars think about the moon.
Like the moon thinks about the sun.
And the sun thinks about clouds.
I'm thinking about you like clouds think about rain.
Like rain thinks about falling.
Like falling thinks about catching.
Like catching thinks about my heart.
And my heart thinks about You.
I'm thinking about you like you think about sports.
Like sports think about first place.
Like first place thinks about happiness.
Like happiness thinks about sadness.
Like sadness thinks about death.
And death thinks about life.
I'm thinking about you like life thinks about tomorrow.
Like tomorrow thinks about yesterday.
Like yesterday thinks about mistakes.
Like mistakes think about success.
And success thinks about money.
I'm thinking about you like money thinks about cars.
Like cars think about driving.
And driving thinks about crashing.
I'm thinking about you like crashing thinks about the ground.
Like the ground thinks about shoes.
Like shoes think about socks.
Like socks think about warmth.
Like warmth thinks about hugs.
And hugs think about kisses.
I'm thinking about you like kisses think about Love.
Thursday, February 14, 2013
Valentines Day...
I apologize, in advance, to the people who really like Valentines Day. But really? Someone PLEASE explain to me why we need one whole day that is, specifically, for expressing your love to someone. Last I checked you could express your love to someone whenever you wanted... I'm just sayin'.
Valentines Day, in my opinion, is the most pointless holiday ever created! I mean, I even wore Christmas socks to school this Valentines Day. And that's saying a lot because I am ready for the snow to be gone, and I don't want Christmas to come yet!
I hate hearing people say, "Happy Single Awareness Day!" I'm aware that I'm single every day. Thanks for reminding me! I almost forgot about being single for one whole day before you reminded me. Psh....... Jerk! At least I'm not one of the people making out in the hallway every day! So quit reminding me that I'm single.
I realize that people like dressing up, getting chocolates, flowers, and teddy bears with hearts all over them. But seriously? You can get and/or give that kind of stuff to anyone ANY DAY! I think everyone should pick a random day to give something to someone. Because honestly, who wouldn't like getting a note, chocolates, flowers, or any other type of present on a random day? It would definitely make that person feel special.
So..... Enough with the little lovey-dovey Valentines Day crap! Express your love to someone whenever you want! And be that person who makes someone else feel special, not because you have to, but because you want to!
Valentines Day, in my opinion, is the most pointless holiday ever created! I mean, I even wore Christmas socks to school this Valentines Day. And that's saying a lot because I am ready for the snow to be gone, and I don't want Christmas to come yet!
I hate hearing people say, "Happy Single Awareness Day!" I'm aware that I'm single every day. Thanks for reminding me! I almost forgot about being single for one whole day before you reminded me. Psh....... Jerk! At least I'm not one of the people making out in the hallway every day! So quit reminding me that I'm single.
I realize that people like dressing up, getting chocolates, flowers, and teddy bears with hearts all over them. But seriously? You can get and/or give that kind of stuff to anyone ANY DAY! I think everyone should pick a random day to give something to someone. Because honestly, who wouldn't like getting a note, chocolates, flowers, or any other type of present on a random day? It would definitely make that person feel special.
So..... Enough with the little lovey-dovey Valentines Day crap! Express your love to someone whenever you want! And be that person who makes someone else feel special, not because you have to, but because you want to!
Sunday, February 10, 2013
What I Want
How could a four letter word mean so much?
And make me feel this way?
It's too hard to let go of what I felt for you.
But getting you back is even harder.
How could my feelings towards you change so instantly?
Every day is a challenge to hide what I feel.
It hurts to think it was love I felt
But now it's just a want
And what I want is you.
I want you back in my life
I want everything back to the way it used to be.
The way we used to be.
Love.....
Does love mean one thing?
No.
Love could be like how you love your family. It could be the love you have for your friends. The love you have for cheesecake! Yum! I LOVE cheesecake! Back to what I was saying........ OR it could be that type of love you feel when you see that special someone ;)
But how can a four letter word have the affect on you the way it does? Honestly, I am wondering the same thing.
I know that love might seem a little gross, but everyone feels it! Some people might agree with Adam Sandler in The Wedding Singer that "love stinks", and sometimes it does, but I don't think people notice that love isn't always about.... well.... loving someone passionately.
My grandpa's quote he lived by is "Love is when someone else's happiness is more important than your own." And you know what? That is exactly what I think it is. And it can refer to any type of love that you are talking about, except for food. If you love someone, wouldn't you want them to always be happy? I would. And I hope you would too!
Don't be afraid to love just because you feel like you will get hurt. Unfortunately, you probably will at some point, but experiencing that hurt will be worth it in the end! That's what I'm hoping anyways.......
No.
Love could be like how you love your family. It could be the love you have for your friends. The love you have for cheesecake! Yum! I LOVE cheesecake! Back to what I was saying........ OR it could be that type of love you feel when you see that special someone ;)
But how can a four letter word have the affect on you the way it does? Honestly, I am wondering the same thing.
I know that love might seem a little gross, but everyone feels it! Some people might agree with Adam Sandler in The Wedding Singer that "love stinks", and sometimes it does, but I don't think people notice that love isn't always about.... well.... loving someone passionately.
My grandpa's quote he lived by is "Love is when someone else's happiness is more important than your own." And you know what? That is exactly what I think it is. And it can refer to any type of love that you are talking about, except for food. If you love someone, wouldn't you want them to always be happy? I would. And I hope you would too!
Don't be afraid to love just because you feel like you will get hurt. Unfortunately, you probably will at some point, but experiencing that hurt will be worth it in the end! That's what I'm hoping anyways.......
Friday, February 1, 2013
Hurt
Do you feel the way I do?
The aching pain in my chest I feel when I see you.
Why do I still feel this,
Have you ever experienced this pain,
Will it ever go away,
Or will it always be a part of my life?
Is it going to drag me down,
Tear me apart?
It hurts to see you everyday,
And to see that you don't feel the way I do.
Do I wish that you would feel this way?
No.
I just wish you knew how I feel,
Hurt.
The aching pain in my chest I feel when I see you.
Why do I still feel this,
Have you ever experienced this pain,
Will it ever go away,
Or will it always be a part of my life?
Is it going to drag me down,
Tear me apart?
It hurts to see you everyday,
And to see that you don't feel the way I do.
Do I wish that you would feel this way?
No.
I just wish you knew how I feel,
Hurt.
Being Alive
What does being alive mean to you?
Does it mean that you can bleed when you get hurt? Does it mean that you can grow, and get older? What do you think?
If you can bleed and grow, I think that you are alive. Honestly though, the thing that makes being alive so real to me is the fact that you can feel. You can feel the excitement and happiness from scoring a goal, or winning first place in a dance competition. You can feel heartbreak when someone you love doesn't love you anymore. The sadness you feel when a family member passes away, and realizing that you won't see them tomorrow. You get to have that amazing experience of loving someone, and wanting to be with them forever.
It's feeling all of these different emotions that wakes me up, because I wouldn't be able to feel those things if I was asleep. I might have the imagination that I could feel those things, but it wouldn't be real.
We all need to make sure that we can recognize what being alive is all about. We need to "live in the moment", and remember everything we feel. If you don't..... You will never understand what being alive is all about.
Does it mean that you can bleed when you get hurt? Does it mean that you can grow, and get older? What do you think?
If you can bleed and grow, I think that you are alive. Honestly though, the thing that makes being alive so real to me is the fact that you can feel. You can feel the excitement and happiness from scoring a goal, or winning first place in a dance competition. You can feel heartbreak when someone you love doesn't love you anymore. The sadness you feel when a family member passes away, and realizing that you won't see them tomorrow. You get to have that amazing experience of loving someone, and wanting to be with them forever.
It's feeling all of these different emotions that wakes me up, because I wouldn't be able to feel those things if I was asleep. I might have the imagination that I could feel those things, but it wouldn't be real.
We all need to make sure that we can recognize what being alive is all about. We need to "live in the moment", and remember everything we feel. If you don't..... You will never understand what being alive is all about.
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